Hullo

To all my friends -

I wanted to put this in writing so that you won’t forget. I hate hanging out with couples unless if I’m in a couple. No one likes being a third wheel, and I can’t ever truly be myself in front of anyone’s significant other.

Thanks!

Why, hewwo thewe Mista.

On the first date, I wore what I wore to work and barely touched up my makeup from the morning. The least I can do on the second date is brush my hair. The second date is tomorrow. I hope we don’t watch a movie again. I didn’t mind the first time, but I’m always fidgety and agitated after work – I doubt I’ll be able to sit in one place.

I am not pleased with my appearance right now. I have a job that I love, but I am constantly stressed out, which causes my body to react. I went from a waist size of 25 to 26 in one month, and I’ve been breaking out non stop. I know it sounds ridiculous that I’m even worried about gaining 5 pounds but I think it’s important for women to take pride in their appearance. To be honest, my recent minor weight gain is due to the fact that I’ve been pretty happy. Stressed, busy, but happy. You can really tell how happy I am by how much I weigh. Isn’t that strange? When I’m looking like Star Jones pre-gastric bypass, it means I’m extremely happy.

No apologies

Spoil: to impair, damage, or harm the character or nature of (someone) by unwise treatment, excessive indulgence, etc.: to spoil a child by pampering him.

I never want to be with someone that calls me spoiled, or makes me feel bad for enjoying what my parents’ hard work provides me. My parents work very hard, and I don’t feel like I should have to feel sorry for their success. I am very proud of their success, and they are proud of me for being a little firecracker. My parents didn’t do a bad job of raising me. They raised me to be compassionate, loyal and open-minded. They didn’t do bad at all. I’m going to knock out the next guy I date that calls me spoiled. It infuriates me.

living the life

I’m in week 5 of my summer vacation, and all I have to say is that I am living the life right now. I just went to the International Pinot Noir Celebration (http://www.ipnc.org/passport.php), and tasted over 60 pinot noir wines in under 3.5 hours. Also got a take home Riedel wine glass, which is just money.

I’m spending the next 3.5 days in Portland, and then hitting up Seattle for 3.5 days to visit some of the boys and girls that I know up there. Should be an awesome time. What’s the moral of this story??

I love not working and living the life. It’s all about living large and making enough to sustain that lifestyle.

Boom.

Don’t Want No Plain Vanilla Man

There are your OGs, your Gents, your DBs, your best friends; there are your Sports Fanatics, your Nerds, your Rockers, your Hillbillies and Turds; there are Jocks and Jews, Rhythm and Blues, there are Big and Small Members, there are Members Only and – good God! – some men come in Members Only.  There are even incredible men of French given name, Russian surname with bouncy ‘fros and beautiful eyes of blue (of which there are far too few).  There are women, there are men.  There is your lover, there is your ex, but I’ve only seen one man thus far who is pure, raw sex.

Done and done

After this (fun) weekend, I now have a clearer picture of what kind of man I am looking for:

• Tall
• Lanky
• Good humored
• A little dorky – I love glasses guys in glasses
• Tolerant of the douchey things I like to do on weekends, such as wine tasting, getting massages or brunch every Saturday morning
• NOT a blazer-wearing-douche-bag
• Asian. This cannot be compromised.

I actually had a pretty big crush on a cute, tall, lanky, good humored, dorky, Asian and seemingly tolerant guy for the last 24 hours. Jeff. I met him when I was in a cab in the Tenderloin on Friday night.

On Saturday, I had brunch in the Castro and burned my calories while I ate them. Dancing and eating simultaneously – what’s more fun than that? Oh, and drinking..lots of drinking.

I have more to say but I’d rather take a nap. Next entry: douchey things I like to do that aren’t so douchey at all.

EMBAWASSED!

A few things I’m embawassed about:

• Due to a conference call I had at 6:30 AM this morning (oh, the joys of reporting to people on the east coast), I had to make sure I had access to all the briefing materials the night before. Like clockwork, my company’s portal site freaked out on me again. You know how that drives me crazy. I called my company’s IT guy at 12:45 in the morning and had him access my computer remotely. He logged on, and right then, I noticed that I had a document saved on my desktop named, “ONE NIGHT STANDS” – in caps. It was actually a piece I had written for this blog that never made the final cut (ha – like I actually think about my entries before I write them). However, to the IT guy, it must have looked like a list I saved of one night stands I had. Mortifying. By the way, I have never, ever had a one night stand. I’m just not one of those people that believe that sex is “just sex”. It’s a lifestyle choice. It’s not really my style.
• I’m embawassed for John Edwards. I really liked him too.
• I’m embawassed about my poor judgment in men for the last 1.5 years. I realized that if my friends hate the guy I’m dating, 9/10 times they hate with reason.
• I’m embawassed about my hair. It needs to get cut.

I went to another industry thing (a party my client was throwing) and was one of the only girls. There were many good looking VC’s and SF techies – the usual. I actually talked to 3 cute guys without feeling awkward – go me! And they were so normal! I love normal guys. The party was boring, so I left after half an hour to shop for a new dress for brunch on Saturday.

I realized that I only talk about 4 things in this blog: work, industry parties, my awkwardness with men, and brunch.

If that’s not a fabulous way to live your 20’s, I don’t know what is.

F*ck!

Another iTunes gift certificate.  First person to reply to this post get’s the code ($15).

It never ends

As if I didn’t spend enough hours at the office, my company handed me a BlackBerry today. When I first started fidgeting with it, I was like, “Oh cool! I can Twitter more efficiently, log on Facebook on-the-go, read tabloids while I’m waiting, find directions whenever I’m lost..”

..And then I received a work related email. And then another. And another. And another. And then all of a sudden, my BlackBerry didn’t seem so fun anymore.

Alternative lifestyles and loving someone of the same sex without being a homosexual

I love my best friend. She is probably the most beautiful, intelligent and mind-blowingly hilarious woman I know. Except for her new obsession with Aaron Eckhart, she embodies what I am looking for in a man.

Today, we came to the realization that because we’re both peculiar women, there’s a possibility that we might spend our lives together as life-partners, raising babies we conceived from goodies we find at a sperm bank. I mean, it’s not so bad. She and I have many similar values. We’ve been best friends for over 10 years. We’ve always been unconventional. If we realize that we’re shit out of luck with men, this is probably the next best thing, and it’ll probably be better than a dead-end heterosexual marriage. We won’t be living a lie.

My hope is that this is only a possibility and not a reality. After all, I am only 22, with many, many years ahead of me. I’ve also only been single for 3 months. Not very long, but the longest – ever – for me. Owned.

My possible life partner will also be joining us as our female NYC blogger, so please make her feel welcome!

Cheers!