Single

Aside from my coworkers, I don’t have any single female friends. It sucks. I spend much of my nights chatting online with my single male friends, but all my female friends have boyfriends and are probably off getting laid. Lucky girls. In addition to the nightly entertainment I get from my single friends of the opposite sex (what is better than hearing stories about your male friends getting unmentionable favors under the table at bars? Or in the restroom at Longs Drugs?), I have my blogs. I can always rely on my nightly reads to keep me entertained for a few hours. But after I read all my blogs, and the boys sign offline, I usually stare at my computer screen with a blank expression. What to do, what to do..

I’m a busy body. I don’t like to sit around. But because my industry is demanding, I’m often tired. Conflict, man. Conflict.

Because I’ve been in serious relationships since I was 14, I overcompensate when I hit the town (and paint it red – a dark, burgundy red). I get stupidly drunk and dance on furniture that should never be danced on. And why not? I am an un-ugly, 22 year old female that has nothing to lose but her dinner from drinking too much. Although I know my friends find it amusing to watch me get hammered every time we go out, their hard drinking days are long gone. I missed out on some prime party time in college, when I was too busy accepting a promise ring from my ex who I thought I would marry. I gave that ring back, btw. He was a great guy, and any woman would be lucky to have him. But me? I wish I partied more when all my friends were still single.

I’m a single girl with no single friends. This conversation wraps up my weekends quite nicely:

GucciManLA: HAHAH i was going to write a post
GucciManLA: about **** today
Darla: OMG LOL
Darla: I WAS GOING TO WRITE A **** ENTRY TOO
Darla: LOL
GucciManLA: we’ll collaborate
GucciManLA: on a post this wekeend
Darla: WORD
Darla: alright
GucciManLA: on our friday night
GucciManLA: = at home
GucciManLA: LOL
GucciManLA: owned

Owned, indeed.

I want I want I want

God dammit. BART was stop go stop go stop go stop go for the last 20 minutes. It’s an ordeal commuting to and from work. I need to move out of the suburbs and into the city, but I’ll wait until it’s the right time. I live rent free in a big house with my own room (which has a big bed) and I get to use as many closets as I want, as long as my sister is still away at school. My parents pay for my gas and food and there is never a shortage of wine in my house. There is no embarrassment in living at home because it’s completely socially acceptable for girls to live at home. I don’t have any reason to want to move out, except for the commute. It is killing me.

I am currently trying to convince TheBusDriver to go to Las Vegas in August so I can tag along. I am dead set on getting a private cabana by the pool (we didn’t last time because bad weather). Also, it’s imperative that we pay a visit to Cut. I love steak. With the amount of alcohol we plan on drinking, I’m sure that the 4 of us will come back from this trip with plenty of sinful stories. Please, please, please BusDriver. Let’s go to Vegas!!

Anyway, if we don’t go to Vegas in August, I’ll have to schedule something else that’s fabulous that month. I am going to Napa with GucciManLA in July, and NYC to visit TheBusDriver and some other friends in September. I need to have something fabulous to do every month or else I’ll melt out of boredom. I am restless restless restless and this headache is killing me why am i even blogging right now hahaakdfss!!!!

Becks is in da house!

I just received an email from my coworker containing the following info:

FYI, David Beckham will be in Union Square this afternoon at 5 pm, promoting Emporio Armani underwear.

 

J

*GASP. Too bad I never get out of the office until 6:30-7. If not, you KNOW I’d be running over ALL those 12 year olds with my five inch heels.

boom. this is how we do.

I don’t consider myself much of a blogger.  Lets just say that I’ve had a few unsuccessful attempts at blogging, for reasons unknown to me.  Perhaps subject matter might be key; people just don’t find my life very interesting, or they don’t really want to hear about my next stock pick (which, btw, I do think pharmaceuticals are a great play right now.)  It could be the fact that I try to bring my sarcastic personality online and make feeble attempts to put it in words, all of which I am attempting to do right now.  However, I’ve always wanted to start a blog that would discuss something interesting, relevant, and most of all a topic that would bring some laughter to the people reading it.

Anyways, as the ring leader of this blog Ngowned pitched the idea to me of a blog discussing the single life, I decided that it was time to restart my blogging career, with hopes of vaulting myself and this site into the upper echelons of the blogging community.  The specific genre of this blog suited exactly what I had hoped to achieve; a highly interesting topic that provides both sobering and humorous moments.  So, here I am, representing from LA with my blog name being what my students call me in my classroom everyday, Gucciman.

A bit about myself.  I am a 22 year old male living in Los Angeles.  The end of this week will officially be the 1-year mark since I moved here from the east coast to become a high-school math teacher in the ghetto.  My schedule is almost always packed during the weekdays, and often during the weekends, and so this past year has been extremely busy.  It’s been so hectic that the last date I remember going on must have been at least a few months ago, and maybe even longer than that.  Unlike the other bloggers here, I can’t claim to ever have had a girlfriend, which might be a bit surprising considering I’m 22.  I sometimes question whether that’s odd, but then I think to myself that it provides me with a unique perspective on relationships, or rather, attempts to be in a relationship.

I just got back from dinner at a Cuban restaurant here in LA and had quite a good time discussing some of the past dates I’ve been on with girls in Boston (where I went to college.)  Both my friends also went to college with me, and so it was quite entertaining reflecting back on some of my past successes and failures in the dating game.  I will no doubt share some of these stories in subsequent postings.  Other than that, not much more to report.  I’m outside on my balcony right now smoking a cigar, drinking some Arizona green tea, and loving every moment of the weather out here.

Cheers, to a year in LA, and to an extremely successful blog.  Stay tuned.

When in doubt, blog.

The idea for this blog came about a couple hours ago. I was spending my Sunday evening online, chatting with the usual suspects, when I realized (and I realize this quite often) that I needed a new hobby. With no current boyfriend, boy-toy or love interest in sight, I have a lot of time on my hands. It’s amazing what being single can do for your interactive life. Since February, I’ve snapped up an extra Facebook account (don’t ask), resurrected my blog (which was deleted months later when it became bigger than I was), accumulated over 140 reviews on Yelp and started taking my Google Reader seriously. I thought, Hell, I should start blogging again. Might as well write what I would have IMed to a friend in a blog so that I don’t have to repeat myself to multiple people. Within minutes, I IMed Calzone, Faaack and GucciMan, and this blog was born.

And since I’ll be sharing this blog with three other gentleman, I figure that now would be a good time to introduce myself. I am a 22 year old, single female, living in the Bay Area. I work in public relations in San Francisco, and I work damn hard, which makes me moody occasionally. I have been in relationships since the age of 14. Having had an especially pointless and tumultuous relationship since last August, I’ve been officially single since February. What I’ve been doing unofficially…well, that will be saved for a future blog entry.

If you’re wondering, I woke up at 10 AM this morning, ate two heaping plates of salty food at Hometown Buffet (with my sunglasses on, indoors), and napped until 3 PM. After I woke up, I went to Costco for pizza and hotdogs with my brother. I’ve been sitting in my underwear for the past 4 hours, browsing reviews of restaurants in Napa (I’m going in a month) and reading what I’ve missed out on from Gawker in the past week.

Fun fun for everyone.

And the blogging begins.

Hey babes & fellas,

Welcome to our new blog.

Sit back and relax, as you live vicariously through our single antics.

-The Singles